Submitted by BOM Kathryn Trattner
I love Disney’s Tangled. Love it. Sing along to it. Get all teary eyed when I watch it. My son loves it too. So we watch it a lot.
Moment of confession here: I owned it before I had kids.
So, we (my toddler, my four month old, and myself) were watching Tangled for the thousandth time and I started to pick it apart. Maybe it was the devil-may-care, some-men-just-want-to-watch-the-world-burn mood I was in that day but I began to question aspects of the story. I’m not even going to touch on all that hair and no split ends.
- Where does Mother Gothel go every day? Does she spend quality time at the Snuggly Duckling bar with all those guys clad in leather and studs? Do I even want that question answered?
- Where did Pascal come from? And how do I teach my future pet chameleon to practice ventriloquism with me?
- Rapunzel’s dress is too small. Disney was clever, you don’t notice at first but by the twentieth viewing you realize it’s super cute but obviously too small. Bad evil mom! It’s just more evidence of her wickedness. Which we already know a lot about because she wears a hooded cape. Oh yeah, and the baby snatching thing.
- Do we realize that the horse is smarter than the human guards? How has this kingdom survived so long? What did it do before Max the Horse came along? No, really. I wanna know. Or is Max only the most recent in a long line of brilliant horses secretly running things behind the scenes like the Illuminati?
- The first time Rapunzel hits the big city not one person asks about her hair. People step over it and go around it. How special can miles of split-end-free tresses be if no one even looks at her strangely? Where are all these other young women with miles and miles of silky strands? Are there other towers? Is this a universe full of Rapunzel-like women with hair of various shades all having adventures with their own versions of Flynn Rider?
- Speaking of Flynn Rider, how does he handle anniversaries later on? The whole movie is basically a first date that’s impossible to top. Adventure, life-and-death situations, amazing songs, golden flying lanterns, reuniting a lost princess with her family—everything after that is going to be tame. I wonder if he decides to reenact it for their fiftieth wedding anniversary but throws his back out trying to climb a tower?
- Rapunzel brings Flynn back from the dead with a kiss. And love, but it’s really the kiss that’s the important thing here. That’s a heck of a first kiss. My first kiss was…not that. True, the guy I’d kissed hadn’t just been stabbed and then healed by magic hair and/or golden flower magic. It’s pretty hard to beat that.
- How does Rapunzel not end up in therapy? The mother she’s known all her life wasn’t really her mom and then the not-a-mom fell out a window. Poof! Gone in a cloud of really old lady dust. That’s just screams for extra long therapy sessions and possibly a round of healing hypnosis.
- Rapunzel marries the first guy she meets! Not just the first guy she kisses. She marries THE FIRST GUY SHE MEETS. Think about that for a second. Think about the first guy you met. That poor girl!
- This isn’t a question but a comment. Think about the scene when Rapunzel sees her parents for the first time. I challenge anyone to keep a dry eye. I cry every time. It doesn’t matter who’s in the room or what’s going on. I stop to watch and cry like a baby. Last night while watching my toddler reached out and held my hand. Which made me cry harder.
But no matter how many questions the story generates or how unbelievable it is I’m going to keep watching and singing along. Tangled is a rare and beautiful thing, a fantastic story full of humor and heart. (Better than Frozen and its catchy anthem, in my opinion.) Plus, for five whole minutes at a time my toddler sits quietly to watch. That’s a bathroom break without a little person asking what I’m doing right there!
Blogger of the Month Kathryn Trattner is a reader, writer, and busy mom. She lives and writes in Oklahoma City supported by three cats, two kids, and one husband. Find her at kathryntrattner.com but she won’t be there, you know, in person. She’s probably hiding under the covers with a flashlight and a book.